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This is the night I almost gave up. Just in case you wanted to know.
But then I remembered how I felt before all this happened.... and that is not a good place to be either. I'm not going to ruin this for myself. If I get hurt in the end, then I get hurt. Whatever, I'll get over it. But why punish myself right now, when there's no reason to? I'm retarded. Do all girls do this? Confuse themselves and convince themselves that they're not at all good enough, so the boy that likes them HAS to be lying or crazy to feel that way about her...?

sheesh. I'm ridiculously complicated.

But when I'm happy, and confident, I'm pretty much the most awesome person ever to be around.

So whatever. I'll believe him for now.. and have hope.. and pray... and all that.. sigh.
And I won't give up. And maybe someday I can look back and remember this night and thank myself for just holding out longer. Because he's all I've wanted for a long time. And now I'd wanna give that up because I'm unsure??

I'm ridiculous. Ridiculous I say.

He is pretty amazing. :] Why am I so stupid? Maybe tomorrow I'll feel better about this.
Adieu my friends.. adieu.